S04E10 — It's open.

It's open.

门没锁

Look at us. Our group's first grown-up Christmas party.

瞧瞧咱们 学习小组的第一个成人圣诞派对

Thanks for hosting. I hope you don't mind.

谢谢你举办这次派对 希望你不介意

I brought a few things just to make the place look a little less short-term corporate housing .

我带了些东西过来 准备帮你装饰一番 以便显得你这里不这么像短租公寓

Oh, well, mi casa es su art project .

好吧 我家就是您的艺术大作

Cool.

酷

Figured just a little something there, a little zhuzh right there.

我准备在这放点儿东西 再在那搁点儿玩意儿

Just a few things to add a little Annie.

寥寥数件宝贝 彰显 安妮 风格

Annie, do we have to have another talk about you wanting to play house with me?

安妮 我们还有必要再一次谈谈 你想跟我玩过家家的这种欲望吗

Sha. Sha-na-not.

切 才木有咧

I'm just decorating for a party.

我只是为了派对稍微装饰一下

Oh, I saw these curtains, and I couldn't resist .

这窗帘我一看到 就忍不住买了下来

Let's just live with them for a night.

咱们就挂一晚上

We can totally return them.

反正可以全额退货

Oh, let's totally return them.

就是 全额退货去吧

Jeff. Live with them for one night.

杰夫 就挂一晚

Actually, these will also work for Valentine's Day, Presidents Day, whenever people get to see it.

其实 这窗帘在情人节也能用 还有总统日和其它所有需要的日子

Annie, what is this?

安妮 这是什么

Oh. I know we said no gifts, But I couldn't resist.

我知道我们说过不送礼 但人家就是忍不住嘛

You realize you've just put your friends in a very awkward position.

你知道这样会让朋友们 很尴尬吗

A gift creates obligation .

礼物意味着责任

I don't see it that way.

我不这么想哎

Well, I do, and I think the others will too.

我这么想 我觉得他们也会这么想

Merry Christmas.

圣诞快乐

I know we said no gifts, but I couldn't resist.

我知道我们说过不送礼 但我还是忍不住

Oh, who couldn't have seen that coming?

是啊 早该想到会变成这样

Oh, Annie, I love what you did with the place.

安妮 你把这里装饰得挺不错的呀

It's a work in progress.

我还没收拾完

Good tidings, fellow Christmas celebrators.

大家好 一起欢庆圣诞的朋友们

And to all a good wassailing.

希望今晚的酒宴完满落幕

I know we said no gifts, but we couldn't resist.

我知道我们说过不送礼 但我们没忍住

There's a real problem with resistance in this group.

学习小组集体抵抗力变差了还是怎么着

Hi. Thank you all so much for inviting me to my first Christmas.

谢谢你们所有人 邀请我参加平生第一个圣诞节

Oh, Annie explained to me that "No gifts" Means "Bring gifts."

安妮跟我解释过 不送礼 就是 要送礼 的意思

I'm getting it. No means yes.

我懂 不 就是 要

So this is Christmas. Just this.

这就是圣诞 就这样

I was hoping we could do a Die Hard in a restaurant.

我还指望大家在餐馆里玩《虎胆龙威》

There's a place called Nakatomi Sushi.

有个叫中富寿司的店

I hear the Hans Grouper is to die for.

我听说那里的汉斯石斑鱼很有名

Come on, people, it's all spelled out in your evites.

行了 你们不说话我也懂是什么意思I know you opened them. Oh, I brought gifts. 我知道你们打开了 对了 我带了礼物

Does Annie live here now?

安妮现在搬进来住了吗

Okay. Now that we're all here...

很好 既然人都到齐了

Oh, wait. Where's Pierce ?

等等 皮尔斯呢

Oh, sensitivity training with Gilbert.

和吉尔伯特参加敏感度训练去了

Apparently watching Invictus didn't do the trick.

显然看《成事在人》没用

Okay. Well, now that we are all here, I have some good news and some bad news.

好吧 既然人都到齐了 我有些好消息和坏消息

Great. Black licorice?

很好 是因为黑甘草糖吗

I have to start with the bad news.

我得先说坏消息

It's about our history paper.

尔斯; 是关于我们历史课论文的

I heard through back channels we got a failing grade.

据可靠的小道消息 咱们的论文挂了

What? - Kendra told me.

什么 -肯德拉告诉我的

She does assistant work for professor Cornwallis.

她在康沃利斯教授手下干活

I'll bet she does.

谁说不是呢

We failed? This is terrible .

我们挂了 太悲剧了

I need that paper to graduate .

我需要通过论文才能毕业

Who screwed up their section ?

是谁的部分没写好Jeff, it doesn't matter. - No, it matters to me. 杰夫 这不重要 -对我很重要

I want to know who cost me my early graduation.

我要知道是谁害我不能提早毕业

I didn't do anything wrong. - I worked really hard.

我没做错事 -我写得很认真

Guys, there's no need to point fingers, because I haven't told you the good news.

大家没必要推卸责任 因为我还没告诉你们好消息

I invited the professor to our party tonight.

我邀请教授来参加我们今晚的派对了

Annie! - What? How is that better?

安妮 -什么 这算什么好消息

No, no, Annie's right. This could work.

不不 安妮说得对 这真的有用

I mean, the grade isn't etched in stone.

我是说 成绩还有改动的机会

I mean, these British guys like to socialize with their students.

那些英国人就喜欢跟自己的学生联络感情

We just need to show him a good time, laugh at his jokes, love whatever he loves, and by the end of the night

我们只要让他玩得尽兴就好 他说笑话咱哈哈他喜欢啥咱就喜欢啥 然后等今晚一过

I bet you we can get that grade back up to a "C."

我敢打赌 我们就能让成绩回升到 C

Who knows? Maybe even an "A."

谁知道呢 甚至有可能是 A

Or something realistic .

或者是些更现实点的

And just like that our pleasant holiday party turned into a tense , high-stakes secret mission .

就这样 我们欢快的节日派对 变成了一次危险紧张的秘密任务

No costumes. No funny voices.

向……传教; 不准化装 不准发出奇怪的声音

But, for the purpose of story symmetry, I suggest we wait here silently until the professor arrives.

不过为了让故事前后呼应 我建议我们在这安静地等教授过来

It's the only real plot point we need next.

接下来就靠这唯一真正的转折点了

Oh, what... this is ridic...

搞什 这太荒谬

■ I'm sorry. I can't stay long.

抱歉我不能待太久

I've got my daughter in town.

我女儿还在城里等着我

Didn't want to appear rude .

抱歉我也不想这么无礼

Was I expected to bring a gift?

我应该带礼物吗

No. Nor was anyone else.

不用 其他人也不用Can I show you around, starting with the bar? 让我先带您去吧台转转吧

A lovely place. Very feminine.

这儿真可爱 很有女性气息

Did you hear him use "Feminine" as an insult ?

你听到他用 女性气息 这个词侮辱我们了吗

Typical phallo-centric worldview.

典型的大男子主义

I bet he gave us a failing grade because he could tell my section was written by a strong, independent ...

我肯定他让我们不及格 是因为他看得出我写的部分 带有强烈而独立的

Would you excuse me? I've just seen an old friend.

失陪一下 我刚刚看到了一位老朋友

Hurry back soon.

快点回来

Hey, Abed, got you an early Christmas gift.

阿布蒂 我给你提早准备了圣诞礼物

I know you were bummed about not doing Die Hard in a restaurant.

我知道不在餐馆玩《虎胆龙威》 会让你很无聊

And your recent divorce .

还有你最近的离婚[电影剧情]

To Abed, yippee-ki-yay, Father Christmas.

致阿布蒂 呀呀个呸 圣诞老人

I tried to get you "Taking off shoes", but I didn't know how to wrap it.

我本来想写 把鞋脱掉 但我不知道该怎样包起来

John Mcclane's tank top?

约翰·麦克连的背心

You're getting really good at Christmas, Troy.

行进; 你真会挑圣诞礼物 特洛伊

It's Macallan Eighteen.

这是麦卡伦18年陈酿威士忌

I like to serve it neat if that's okay with you?

我喜欢喝纯的 你不介意吧

What, in America?

你们美国哪

Don't you mix it with cherry pop or Monterey Jack cheese?

你们不是应该混着樱桃汽水 或者杰克干酪一起喝吗

Professor, these are melon slices with ham.

教授 这有些火腿蜜瓜条

And asparagus wrapped in salmon.

和三文鱼芦笋卷

I see somebody's been attempting tapas.

看来有人准备了餐前小吃

Oh, that would be me.

您说的一定是我

I think cuisine is like a window into history.

我觉得料理就像历史的窗户

I believe it was the hun...

我相信是

Actually, you know, I was talking to the ladies.

其实我是在和女士们说话Well, I'll let... I'll leave you three be, all right? 那我就不打扰你们三个了

Britta.

布雷塔

Look, the professor seems to be responding to things that I don't have, So you gotta get in there and jiggle something.

听着 教授貌似对一些 我没有的东西感兴趣 所以你得加入他们 展示你的魅力

He hates me.

他讨厌我

He called me Broken Barbie all year.

他这一年来一直在叫我 天残芭比

Well, we're all gonna have to work it if we're gonna get that grade changed.

如果我们想改成绩 那每个人都应该出一份力

Be honest. Your section sucked, right?

老实交待 你写的部分烂透了 对吧

No way.

不可能

I read an entire book on the Peloponnesian War.

我把整本关于伯罗奔尼撒战争的书都看完了

Wow. You pronounced it right.

你居然还念对了

Then someone else had to tank it for us to get that "F."

看来得把这盆脏水泼在其他人头上了

Someone else?

其他人

Can you keep a secret? - Yeah.

能保密吗 -能

I blew my section off. - What?

我那部分是瞎写的 -神马

Well, there was a secret Tom Waits show in town, So I did the math.

汤姆·威茨来这里做私密演出 于是我算了比账

There's seven sections to the paper.

论文有七个部分

Annie gets an "A," Pierce buys his from Neil, so that's solid.

安妮能拿到A 皮尔斯花钱找尼尔代笔 也非常稳

And then you guys get "B"s and "C"s, so, I figured if my section gets an "F,"

你们几个能拿到B和C 所以我估计即使我那部分挂了

The worst we could end up with is a "C- minus."

咱们最次也能拿到C-

So you just left your section blank ?

你那部分一个字都没写

No, of course not.

当然不是

I copied and pasted the lyrics to War, What Is It Good For?

我复制黏贴了《战争有什么好处》的歌词

Good god. - Shh.

我的天呐 -嘘

Your friends were counting on you.

你的朋友们还都指望着你呢

Well, that's their fault.

这是他们的错

I have carefully cultivated a persona that screams, "You're on your own."

我精心培育了一付 你们别指望我 的表情

That's my judgey face.

这是我鄙视的表情

Noted. I'll make it right.

明白 我会亡羊补牢的

I'm going back in.

我重新来过

How's it going?

情况怎么样

Well, he asked me to get my fit bum to the kitchen for a refill, So that's good, right?

他让我轻摇香臀到厨房给他添酒 情况不错 对吧

Kevin's showing him a card trick.

凯文在给他表演扑克魔术

What? Oh, God.

什么 天呐

Is this a card?

是纸牌[方片]吗

No, it isn't. Queen of hearts.

不 是红心Q

No, I'm asking, is this a card?

不 我在问你这是纸牌吗

Hey, Kevin, did you know that we have bubble wrap?

凯文 你知道我们有气泡膜包装吗

What? - Poppy poppy paper.

什么 -能捏出啪啪啪的包装纸

I so enjoy that. Do you mind if I pop some?

我太喜欢了 能让我啪啪几个吗

Oh, go crazy.

尽情捏去吧

Changnesia.

昌癔症

I mean, why do you indulge that idiot?

你为什么要纵容他呢

Oh, I, too, was skeptical at first, but now I actually have some sympathy .

我一开始也非常不理解 但我现在对此表示同情

I believe it was Tacitus who said...

塔西佗[古罗马元老院议员]曾说

You know, Mr. Winger, your pathetic attempts to suck up to me are a wee bit transparent .

翁格先生 你意图舔我菊的心思 实在是太明显了

I mean, I can only surmise that it's something to do with the "C-minus" I gave you for that final paper.

我只能将此事归结为 因为你们的论文 我只给了个C-

C- "C-minus"?

Oh, thank you. Is this the...

谢谢 这是...

If you'll excuse us.

失陪一下

Annie, he's giving us a "C-minus."

安妮 他给了我们C-

Right. - A "C-minus" is not a failing grade.

是啊 -C-不是挂科啊

To me, it is.

对我来说是

I'm on a valedictorian track, and a "C-minus" means I fail to get valedictorian.

我本该是最优毕业生 得C-我就无法在毕业典礼上致告别辞了

You ruined our Christmas dinner so you could be crowned the smartest person at the dumbest school?

你毁了我们的圣诞晚餐 就为了在最笨学校里做最聪明的人吗

Look, the only reason I agreed to kiss that pompous anglo's ass was because I thought we were getting an "F."

我之所以同意给那个装逼犯舔菊 是因为我以为咱们挂科了

Good news, Mr. Winger.

好消息 翁格先生

You may remove your lips from my buttocks, Because you have in fact succeeded in changing your grade.

你可以把唇从我的菊上挪走了 因为你刚刚成功的 改变了你们的分数

It's now an "F." - what?

现在是F了 -神马

You're "F"-ing us?

你要挂我们

Professor, if you could just give us a minute, this has been a terrible misunderstanding, and I'm sure we can get this whole thing sorted out.

教授 请给我们几分钟 这是一个重大的误会 我相信咱们一定能把这事解决好

Bedroom. Now.

去卧室 马上

Jeff just got us an "F."

杰夫害我们挂科了

I thought we had an "F." - No, we were lied to.

我们不是已经挂了吗 -不 我们被骗了

This isn't fun. That guy's creepy.

这不好笑 那家伙太吓人

Yeah, if there's a human version of Scrooge McDuck, this guy is it.

对 那老东西简直就是真人版的唐老鸭

This wouldn't have happened if Jeff hadn't taunted him.

都是因为杰夫把他惹恼了

No, it wouldn't have happened if you hadn't decided a "C-minus" isn't good enough.

不 要不是因为你觉得C-不够好 这倒霉催的事情也就不会发生了

When are you gonna grow up and realize that grades don't matter outside of school?

你什么时候才能成熟起来 认识到毕业后分数并不重要

That's a lie they tell dumb people when they're fitting them for work boots.

这种谎言是用来糊弄 那些蓝领工人的

All we needed was a passing grade, and we had it until you dragged us into this mess .

我只需要及格毕业就好 我们拿到了 你却让我们卷进这破事

Judgey face. - All right.

鄙视的表情 -好吧

I will talk to him, man to man, and try to get our "C-minus" Back.

我去跟他君子对君子 看能否拿回我们的C-

Annie, it's the best we can do right now.

安妮 我们只能做到这些了

Let me handle this. - Let go of me, you big, hairy nutter!

让我来处理 -放开我 你这个大毛疯子

I'm proving my worth to you guys.

我在向你们证明我的价值

Do you want me to kill him?

要我杀掉他吗

Kevin bad.

凯文 坏坏

I have Changnesia.

我有昌癔症

I'm not a dog.

我不是狗狗

Professor, we're so sorry.

教授 我们非常抱歉

Obviously, Kevin made a mistake.

显然 凯文犯错了

Or did he?

不见得

Why are you "Or did he"-ing him?

不见得神马

I'm just saying the professor can't get any more tied up, and we can't get any less than an "F,"

我只是说 教授被绑得死死的 我们也被挂科了

so let's just take a beat and think this through.

咱们看看能否从长计议

Okay, this is way better than Die Hard in a restaurant.

这比在餐馆里玩《虎胆龙威》强多了

So what exactly is your plan here, Mr. Winger?

翁格先生 你的计划是什么

I mean, I'm certainly not gonna change your grade, And it'll take several days to starve me as I really loaded up on that dreadful tapas.

我肯定不会改变你们的分数 饿死我需要好几天时间 因为我刚才吃了很多点心

Oh, but you already have changed it, professor.

但你已经改过我们的分数了 教授

You just dropped it to an "F,"

你挂掉了我们

thereby proving the work on the page Is not the only factor you consider.

说明论文的内容 不是你评分的唯一标准

And now, thanks to Kevin's complete misreading of the situation, we have our moment of maximum leverage, so let's just talk about this "F."

要感谢凯文完全错误理解 当前形势 我们掌握了很多筹码 那我们来说说这个F

Maybe it can come up to a "C-minus," or, who knows, Perhaps an "A."

也许能变成C- 或者天知道 也许变成A

This is actually a felony.

你们这是在犯罪

I mean, I will call the police, And you will all go to jail .

我一定会报警 你们都会进监狱Let me explain to you why you won't do that. 我来解释一下你为何不会那么做

First, he's tied up.

第一 你被绑着

First, you're tied up, and second, who can really be sure what happened in this apartment ?

第一 你被绑着 第二 谁知道这公寓里发生了什么事呢

Maybe you attacked one of us.

也许你攻击我们其中一人

Oh, really? Where are the signs of struggle?

是吗 打斗的痕迹在哪呢

You were full of scotch when things took a dark turn.

你喝了太多威士忌 酒后无德

We'd all heard about your troubles with co- eds back at Oxford, But it was becoming all too real.

我们都知道你在牛津时跟女学生搞的破事 但悲剧再次重现了

As you lumbered around the room, we had to assume you were coming after me or Britta.

你在屋子里晃来晃去 我们以为你要非礼我或者布雷塔

Or Shirley, who I didn't mention earlier, because she intimidates you sexually.

或是雪瑞 我之所以刚才没提到她 是因为她在性关系上完全力压你

Thank you. - Point being , let's just take the idea of the police off the table, shall we, professor?

谢谢 -重点是 还是不要想报警的事了 好不好教授

Fine. You think you can hold this group together without anyone cracking?

好啊 不过你觉得你能保证 你们之间就不会出什么岔子吗

Oh, we're solid.

当然

Empires are always destroyed from within.

帝国可都是从内部瓦解的

And I can prove it to you from the comparative comfort of this tacky chair .

而我坐在这舒服的破椅子上都能证明这件事

I will give an "A" right now to the first person that unties me.

谁先给我松绑我就给谁A

The rest of you will fail.

其他人挂科

Stay where you are.

待在原地

This is amazing and possibly all in real time.

太赞了 而且都是发生在真实世界里的

Everybody, stop it. No one listen to him.

别吵了 别听他乱说

The professor's job is to make us turn on one another.

教授是想对我们使用反间计

We hold all the cards as long as we stay united.

只要我们团结一心 就不会中计

And, Kevin, you're one of us.

凯文 你是我们的人

Thank you. - All right.

谢谢 -好吧

Who will be the betrayer...

谁会成为背叛者呢

The type-A Lolita,

要强的洛丽塔

The put-upon housewife... - Is that me?

被利用的人妻 -是我吗

Or how about you, the odd, emotionless Muslim?

或者是你 毫无情感的怪胎穆斯林

I mean, come on, you don't deserve an "F."

我是说你不至于得F啊

And you know that, because of your impairment, they'll forgive you anyway .

你知道的 因为你的缺陷 他们会原谅你的

All true, but I'm probably not your best target .

说得对 不过我不是你的最佳攻击目标

If you don't mind, I'd like to get some popcorn.

准某物; 你不介意的话 我打算来点爆米花

Typically, it takes a while for villains to ramp up.

通常情况下 反派需要时间来铺垫

Promise not to monologue till I get back?

我回来之前不要念独白哦

Give it up, professor. You got nothing.

放弃吧 教授 你没有把柄

Oh, I've got plenty.

我有的是

Why don't we just let him go and be done with this?

还是放了他 就这样算了吧

It's Christmas. We have gifts to unwrap.

圣诞节嘛 还得拆礼物呢

Don't you see? We can't now or someone will get the "A."

你没发现吗 不能松绑 不然有人会得A的

No one wants to screw the group.

大家都不想坑害小组成员好吗

Oh, you see that, professor?

看见没 教授

Your offer actually made it harder for you to get untied, because no one wants to be the betrayer.

你的提议使你更难被松绑 因为没人想做背叛者

Beware the ides of March, Mr. Winger.

我得提醒你 翁格先生

Everyone wants to be the betrayer.

每个人都希望成为背叛者

What the hell is your game?

你的把戏是什么

I'm trying to teach you history.

我想教你历史

Your failure will be the same as any self- obsessed nation.

你将跟其他自大的国家一样败得一塌涂地

You only care about each other when you're winning.

只有在顺风的情况下 你们才会关心彼此

The Romans loved Rome when it was raping half the world, but when Hannibal came charging over the alps, the romans turned on themselves as quickly as you can say, "E pluribus unum."

在罗马侵略半个世界时 罗马人无比爱国 但是当汉尼拔冲过来 罗马人背叛了自己 速度那叫一个快 都来不及说 合众为一

I'm pretty sure it's "Anus."

明明是 合屁为一 哎

Usually, the cracks are hidden within the alliances.

通常情况下 裂缝是藏在同盟中的

So let's see.

我看看

In any group of seven, there's bound to be some romantic entanglements.

所有七人组 都会有点情感纠葛

See, I've noticed that the damaged blonde is dating the childish black one, I wonder , does anyone take issue with that pairing?

我注意到脑子不正常的金发妞儿 正在跟孩子气黑娃约会 我在想这个配对有人不满吗

You're fishing, professor. No one has anything against Britta and Troy dating.

你在瞎扯 没人反对 布雷塔和特洛伊约会

And that's coming from Jeff, and we used to date, so...

这话从杰夫口中说出来 要知道我们以前交往过

Britta, information is ammo.

布雷塔 信息就是筹码

And what we did was not dating.

我们那不是交往

A little friction.

小矛盾产生了

That usually indicates heat.

那总会发展成冲突的

Heat? There's no heat.

冲突 没有冲突

If there was heat, I'd be nervous, and, if I was nervous, I'd be rambling, and I'm definitely not rambling, so there's no heat.

有冲突我就会紧张 紧张我就会叨逼叨 而我绝对没有叨逼叨 所以没有冲突

Ah, well, I think we found our triangle .

我们找到三角恋了

Thank you and welcome to the party, Troy.

感谢你 特洛伊 欢迎加入战局

He knows my name.

他知道我的名字

Guys, keep it together.

伙计们 稳住

I missed something great, didn't I?

我错过了精彩剧情 是不是

Enough. It's time to stop arsing about and get serious.

够了 闹够了 说正经的

So let's hear it from the one person who needs that "A" the most and can't possibly abide by an "F,"

小组里有个人非得A不可 拿F是万万不肯不能接受 并且立志要当最优毕业生

the one person on pace to become class valedictorian.

我们来听听这个人的想法

I would never turn against the group.

我绝不会背叛小组

I'm not talking about you, Miss Edison.

不是说你 埃迪生小姐

What? Abed?

什么 阿布蒂

Jeff? - Is it me?

杰夫 -是我吗

Oh, my God, Britta?

老天 布雷塔

First of all, it's me, and, second of all, you put Britta ahead of me?

首先 那人是我 其次 你竟然先想到布雷塔

None taken.

真伤自尊

Oh, my God, Shirley.

老天 雪瑞

Why didn't you ever tell me about it?

你为什么不告诉我

I didn't think it was a competition .

我认为这不是比赛

Oh, of course you'd play it that way so I wouldn't be expecting...

你当然会这么做 这样我会招架不及

A church-going mother of three to be smart, huh?

去教堂礼拜的三孩儿之妈很聪明让人惊讶吗

So, Miss Edison, it's decision time, isn't it?

埃迪生小姐 决定时间到了 不是吗

Annie, don't listen to him.

安妮 别听他的

You know you can't make valedictorian with an "F,"

拿了F你还怎么当致辞的最优毕业生

and you can eliminate your competition in one easy step.

只需向前一步 你就能除掉竞争对手

What else do you have to lose, my dear?

你又没有后顾之忧 不是吗

I mean, these people, they're not here to support you.

我是说他们不是来支持你的

I mean, they already hate you for this disaster of a party.

他们已经因为你毁了派对记恨你了

Not this guy.

不包括这个人

No. I can't.

不 我不能

Give it up, professor. You've fired all your bullets.

放弃吧 教授 你招数已尽

No, I've got one more bullet left, and it's a doozy.

不 我还有一招 老管用了

Mr. Winger, would you like to tell your friends why they did so poorly on this paper, or shall I?

翁格先生 你能告诉大家 为什么小组成绩这么差吗 要不我来说

Jeff? - Jeff?

杰夫 -杰夫

Jeffrey.

杰夫瑞

I tanked my section.

我那部分写砸了

I knew you guys would all work hard, so I just coasted.

我知道你们会努力 所以我就尽情拖后腿了

Tom waits was...

汤姆·威茨

You cost me valedictorian.

你害我拿不到最优

He cost me valedictorian. That was my punch .

他害我拿不到最优 这一拳该我打

Tom Waits!

汤姆·威茨

Oh, my God.

天啊

Jeff, do you have any milk duds?

杰夫你有奶味糖豆吗

Jeffrey, I know you're in there.

杰夫瑞 我知道你在家

I can smell you.

我闻得到你哦

Did I have the game on too loud?

我玩的声音太大了吗

Is everything okay?

你还好吗

I was just spending an evening with my two irresistible lady friends, Rizzoli and Isles, when I heard... wait a minute.

我正与我的两位闺蜜共度良宵 雷佐利和埃尔斯 [《妙女神探》] 突然我听见 等等

What the hell is going on in here? - No, don't!

你们搞毛呢 -不是这样的

I can explain.

我能解释的

No explanation necessary.

不用解释了

Next time you decide to have a party without me, Jeffrey, at least have the decency to do it when I'm in spin class.

下次你再准备开派对不叫我 杰夫瑞 至少在我去上健身课时再开嘛

I'm a blast at holiday-themed parties.

我好歹是节日主题派对的弄潮儿

Where the hell is he? - Professor? Did he leave?

他去哪了 -教授呢 他走了吗

Why in God's name would I leave?

我干嘛要走呢

This is just getting interesting.

好戏才刚刚开始

Now, one of you untied me.

你们中有人给我松了绑

I wonder who it was.

我在想会是谁

Who is the Benedict Arnold, the true hero of this story?

谁是本尼迪克特·阿诺德 这段传奇中真正的英雄

Oh, no, what's gonna happen when we find out

不会吧 我们找出背叛者后

who betrayed us? - I wonder why you're so scared.

会怎样 -你为什么这么害怕

It wasn't me.

不是我干的

Can we just say a ghost did it again?

能不能就当又是闹鬼了呢

We're gonna find out who did it when we get our grade.

你给我们成绩 我们就去找叛徒

No, we'll have to find out now.

不行 我们现在就要找

Otherwise, the lesson isn't complete.

否则这门课就没上完

But the lesson is complete, professor.

课早就上完了 教授

You know what you taught us tonight?

你知道你今晚教给我们什么吗That, yes, empires fall, but we're no empire . 就是王国会倾倒 但我们不是帝王

We're just a bunch of flawed, selfish people.

我们只是一群残缺且自私的人

And that's not our weakness.

这就是我们的弱点

It's our strength .

是我们的力量

The one thing that we can count on at any given moment is that the six of us are paying for a mistake made by one of us.

我们唯一有把握的是 任何时候我们六人中有人犯了错 我们都会一起承担后果

And that means, at any given moment, one of us is screwing up so badly , that he or she is gonna forgive whoever screws up next.

这意味着任何时候 我们中有人搞砸了 他或她都能原谅下一个搞砸的人

Now I'm gonna do something that Octavian never would...

现在我要做一件屋大维从没做过的事

Yeah, I read the book.

没错 那书我读了

I'm gonna say that whoever untied the professor...

我要说不管是谁给教授松了绑

I don't give a crap.

我都不在乎

Because whoever it was, I know it was some flawed, selfish, weak, hopeless soul like me.

因为不管那是谁 我知道你都是跟我一样残缺自私软弱 且无药可救的人

Exactly what the betrayer would say.

完全是叛徒的宣言

Fine, dick, if it was me, I'm gonna lose my "A" by tying you up again.

好吧 混蛋 如果是我 我会宁可不要A 也要再把你绑起来吗

Get over here.

给我过来

That's hurting. That's hurting.

很疼的 好疼好疼

Now, if you'll excuse us, we have some gifts to open.

如果你不介意 我们要拆礼物了

Ooh, mine first, mine first.

先拆我的 先拆我的

Milady.

女士们Kevin, did you wrap these presents yourself? 凯文 这些礼物是你自己包的吗

Once again, I'm not a dog.

我再说一遍 我不是狗狗

Zoink.

给你

Doink.

给你

Kevin, how do you tie a knot ?

凯文 你是怎么打结的

Really simple.

很简单啦

So you go...

就这样

Make a little rabbit ear like so, then the kids go marching down the well.

摆成兔耳朵的形状 一群小孩子排队走

Oh...my...God.

我的天啊

Professor, you were never tied up.

教授 你根本就没被绑住

What?

什么

What do you want me to say?

你想让我说什么

What do you want me to say?

你想让我说什么

That I did it because I'm lonely?

说我是因为孤单才这样做

That my daughter isn't in town?

说我女儿不在本地

That she never comes to see me because she finds me too manipulative?

她从来不来看我 因为她觉得我太爱操纵人

Or you could say you're sorry for the whole thing.

你可以说你对发生的一切感到抱歉

Yes, I suppose that would be accurate .

是的 这样说很对

And that, as compensation for the mental anguish you caused us, you'll give us an "A."

所以为了补偿你对我们造成的 精神损失 你要给我们A

Jeff. Overreaching?

杰夫 太贪心了吧

Fair enough. Maybe you can grade us separately.

好吧 你可以分别给我们打分

That way, Shirley and Annie can get their "A"s.

这样 雪瑞和安妮要得到A

No, Jeffrey, he can give us an "F"

不 杰夫瑞 他可以给我们F

or he can give us an "A,"

也可以给我们A

but we should all get the same grade.

但我们的成绩应该一样

God's sake , don't rub it in.

老天爷 别过分了

Very well. Seeing as you saved me from my yearly Christmas tradition of plum pudding, roasted goose, and updating my suicide note...

好吧 看在你们将我从每年 充斥着李子布丁 烧鹅和更新遗书活动的 传统圣诞节中解救出来的份上

I suppose I could give you a "C".

我想可以给你们个C

C+ Plus .

Merry Christmas.

圣诞快乐

Merry Christmas.

圣诞快乐

*Jingle bell, jingle bell*

*铃铛响 铃铛响*

*Jingle bell rock*

*铃儿响叮当*

*Jingle bells swing*

*铃儿摇摇又晃晃*

*And jingle bells ring*

*铃铛响叮当*

Annie!

安妮

Oh, my God.

天啊

Wow. That's really great.

真棒

All right.

好吧

Oh, poppy poppy paper.

啪啪泡泡纸

No, there's a gift in there.

里面有礼物呢

Yeah.

真棒

Buttered noodles. My favorite .

黄油面条 我的最爱

By the way, i didn't get anyone gifts, so my gift to you all is you get to lord it over me for the next year.

顺便说一下 我没给你们买礼物 所以我送给你们的礼物 就是明年你们可以指使我

No, stupid, a gift doesn't create an obligation.

傻瓜 义务不是礼物

It's the obligation that's a gift.

送礼物才是义务

I gotta drop a deuce.

我得去嘘嘘了

See you guys.

一会儿见

Hey, it's Chang.

喂 我是昌

No, they're not expelled.

没有 他们没被开除

I have to do something else.

我还得找机会下手

I couldn't stay mad at you guys.

我没法总生你们的气嘛

Here. I was gonna save these for the real Christmas day, but these guys were getting antsy.

来 我本来想留到圣诞节当天再送的 谁叫你们等不及了嘛

Hi, there.

你好

August.

这是奥古斯特

And this one is James.

这是詹姆斯

And this one is Fiona.

这是菲奥娜

And these two guys are Jeffrey.

这两只是杰夫瑞

At nice times like this, I wonder what's happening in the darkest timeline.

在如此温馨的时刻 我好奇在最黑暗的平行空间会发生什么

Timeline?

什么空间

Abed, there are no dark timelines.

阿布蒂 没有什么黑暗平行空间

Your Honor, I may not have a right arm, but I am armed with what's right.

法官大人 我也许失去了得力助手 但我不会失去捍卫真理的勇气

My client Miss Edison did rob several drug stores, and, yes, she did stab several pharmacists, but let's talk about the bigger crime , that someone so beautiful has been removed from society .

我的当事人埃迪生小姐也许抢劫了几家药店 她也捅伤了几个药剂师 但更大的犯罪是什么呢是如此美丽的人被社会驱逐

Miss Edison, you are hereby released from Greendale Insane Asylum.

埃迪生小姐 我宣布你正式 被格林德尔疯人院释放

Are you sure you don't have a problem with our age difference?

你确定我们的年龄差不是问题吗

Yeah, I wish you were even younger.

是的 我甚至希望你更年轻

Now, come on, the others are waiting.

来吧 大家都在等着呢

We've got a prime timeline to destroy.

我们还要去摧毁最美好的平行空间呢